Seeing what is
ah, in the corner
look again—
winter chrysanthemum, red
Teijo Nakamura
Perhaps you’ve been given a poinsettia or amaryllis for the holidays. At first, you may enjoy looking at it, maybe even going out of your way to admire it. But gradually, it becomes part of the background. It’s still there but you usually don’t pay attention to it anymore.
The key to creating change in our life is like noticing the chrysanthemum in this haiku. We do an action so often that it becomes unconscious and feels natural. We no longer “see” it or its effects. For example, your posture may be the cause of pain in your body, but your posture feels so normal that you don’t see it as a potential problem. Perhaps you have a stressful relationship with someone. Instead of blaming the other person, take time to review your actions. What is your tone of voice with them? Is your forehead furrowed? Are your words mostly critical, judging or dismissive?
Any change we want in our life requires us to first “see” what we’re already doing. If you can see your starting point realistically, you’ll be more likely to see the change that needs to be made. And, even if your effort to see doesn’t lead to “the” change that needs to be made, it can lead to “a” change, which can be the catalyst for more effective change in the future.
Is there a change you want in your life? If so, how can you “look again” at the possible actions that are creating the problem?